GO EVAA I BELIEVE IN UUU!! MAKE A MOVE ;D

doot doot..

hmm i believe that if you want something in life u have to grab it before the opportunity slips you by! ;)

waiting is painful.. takes too long..lols.. but yes u cant force everything..but if all the signs are clear (and they are very clear evaaaa lol) then u shud make a move and go for it ;) so then u wont hav to wait any longer... and he will be urs..all ursss.. NOWww hahahah :D doesnt that sound goood?? :P

*sigh*

anyways what has been happening with me?.. i havnt had net for.. nearly a month as u can see.. zzz... im very very deprived and it feels soo good to be online and bloggin after soo long.. *bleh*
see waiting sucks eva..lol hahahaha...=/

hmm, i got a class in one hour.. im at jasmine chickns house lol.. shes a partime vlogger hahahah ;) and youtube singer ;) hahahaha... and she got one GIGANTIC house.. omgosh..green with envy i am lols

hehehe.. sigh..anyways, alot has been happening lately.. soo much emotion.. so much.. alcohol..lol.. craziness.. hahaha and i realised tat i am very much attracted to dodgy guys! X_X lols.. the guys that i go for..or want..are all..dodge..lols -_-" great work serene :D hahahah

hmm i shud really be studying but i love internet too much lols

blog more laters hehe =)

- dreamer

hmm well i have been stressing out heaps since i last blogged here..sigh
so much has been happening..uni and rog related.. haha yes =/ still rog related..shuttup..do u wana listen or not haha =)

anyways.. uni..man i fkd up my degree ey hahaha.. instead of graduating this year like i was supposed to.. i am now graduating next year first sem.. sigh.. so that means not graduating with all my dear friends :( booo hahaha.. sigh but thats not a big thing i guess.. id rather spread out my study load and pass my units than overloading and not passing...any hahah.. hmm lols zz

so this sem im only doing 3 units.. slack huh hahaha.. o wells.. and the next im doing 4 and next year iwl be doing two :) thats if i pass everything this year..and sem.. lols hahaha..

blahhh

anyways.. today been a super stressful day for me!! argh.. uni and rog!! = crazy stress day !! blehh

firstly i arrived about half an hour late for my first lecture which isnt ilectured! blehh coz of the stupid traffic..sigh and 9am classes..arghh i hate 9am classes hahaha bleh.. dont get me started on 8! gosh..i havnt done a 8 class ....ever hahahah.. maybe once or twice in first year but i gave that up ...fast :P hahaha
ahhh what a slack person i am hahaha =X

blehh but anyways now im startin to stress coz arghh im going to graduate soon and i havnt done any internships or anything..bleh no work experience..nil! -_-"
WHAT AM I GOING TO DO WITH MYSELF... sigh.. im soo stressed out! i duno where imma be in a few years..and wat im going to do with my life and blehhhh sighhhh WHYyY :( i dont wana grow up!! :(

anyways.. i got sidetracked just then with msn lol.. umm roger.. man iv seen him wayy too many times today bleh.. i mean like at uni! hha sigh. back in the day when we went out we didnt even see each other that much at uni :( lol. but that was okay coz i saw him every morning and night.. most of the time we go to uni and back from uni together :) ahh good times.. sigh so yeah during uni hours we dont see each other too much.. we meet up for lunch every now and then but yeah uni is friends time :) which was a good system..anywayyys..enough about the past.. wat happend today is..i saw him about three times! bleh.. coz hes doing alot of comm now and we both do one unit the same :S which is not very cool AT ALL.. blehhhh just finding that out stressed the crap shit fk out of me :( *cries*

blehh sigh well i duno.. roger..just makes me sad..to think that he has changed soo mcuh sigh..i still wish that we could be ok and still be good like we were in first year =( sigh.. but i dont think that is going to happen anytime soon which really sucks and breaks my heart..sighh i wish that things were different bleh i wish that he still loves me deep down inside hahahahah.. arggh wishful thinkn..dont get u nowhere!!

baaaaaaaaaaaaah..

sighh sheep noises..gosh my head is a mess today!! lol blehhh

anyways yea i think iv rambled and complained enough today lol.i just went crazy to my friend lol.. i shud hav let it out on here instead of him haha but u know.. live..immediate response is alot more funner ..lol funner is a word? =/ haha..

hmmmm ok im going to shower and watch a movie or sumtink..zz

- dreamer (stressed out big time)

why hello! haha. its been a while since i last blogged and im in a typing mood atm so i thought why not start rambling on here since you guys havnt heard from me in a month or so haha :)

anyways, atm i am watching prison break.. its near the end now.. of season one that is.. yes slow i may be to watch this series..but i am watching it now okay.. and its good.. its taking up my time lol and soon it shall be finished and i shall be ready to study study study.. sigh damn uni starting lols.

which brings me to my first day of uni for 2008! haha. i had two lectures.. and i only went to one.. crap! hahaha man the slackness has already began lols. but u can cut me some slack ok.. its a public holiday and uwa has to start school today. damn this uni and not giving us public holidays! boo! unfairness haha. and getting to uni on public holidays is a bitch and a half for me especially. sigh. o wells..

half a day of uni for me.. well, 2 hours worth of uni! haha. it was good to see everyone again :) uni is good.. the daily routine sense of things. to get things in order again and have a set timetable to follow. so that my body clock can start functioning normally again. ... hopefully. lols.

anyways hahah im back to prison break for a bit. i shall type more soon. lol my typing urges have been settled for now.. hahaha :)

ok now that was written on the ... 3rd of march, monday! hahah
and now today is the 5th because its 2am :) lols.. gosh why am i even awake still?! lol i got into bed at 11pm and now its 2! :S and im still awake! hahaha.. well, iv been watching a movie okay.. but it finished about half an hour ago.. but the tiredness has seemed to have faded away. hmmm

well, whats been happening?

iv been going ..emo over roger.. iv been missing my boys lol and iv been slacking off uni haha while spending time with my dad :) hahaha.. its been a tarded few days i tell u.. lols..

we shall start with roger.. once the most important in my priorities but now dropping down the ranks lols.. which is good righT? hahah..well, as u all should know and can tell by my adventures overseas.. in beijing especially lol. the roger problem should be over by now. and i thought it was too and that i was doing really good the first week back in perth. but then on saturday it hit me again for the first time in like nearly 4 months! man i think i was just having a stress attack. thinkn too much about stuff.. and the wei wei thing kinda affecting me too! sigh.

but yeahh.. roger.. saturday and i think it was monday.. yeahh.. been going sad and emo over him :( i would be lying if i said that i didnt miss him or love him still.. sigh. but i know that i cant have him anymore so iv put my feelings away and i dont like him like i used to any more.. but u know, the love will always be there and i still miss him coz its so nice to have someone you know. i guess.. when i find another guy then will i completly stop thinking about him.. hahah in an emo way i mean :)

but yeah, i thought that i was doing good coz since iv been back iv seen him about three times ithink. and its been good! i didnt cry i didnt go emo!;) i was good :) and i thought that we were pretty good too! like we get along really well still and yeah i guess that's where the thinking started again lol. me thinking that we are still good for each other and get along well. hahah sigh. well, he obviously doesnt think that way anymore. he wont even go and watch a movie with me :( zz hmm its like he cant be seen in public with me but he can see me alone... :S hmm yeah sigh its a bit dodgy! o wells... serene u gta stop thinkinG!

hmm my next problem is.. wei wei chuah! sigh. well wei wei.. back in the day..highschool days.. we used to be really really close! and i considered him like my brother :) so when he told me last week over the phone that he doesnt even consider me as a friend any more and that it was over a long time ago.. how do u think i felt?! sigh.. i teared.. i cried.. it really hurts to lose an old friend after soo long and especially if u dont know why!!!

yes i do not know why the hel he is so angy at me and why he doesnt want to be my friend any more!!? i asked him over the phone and he said that if he told me that it would just break me real bad and iwl start crying!..? zzz wat the hel! and besides, if i did something THAT bad..i think that i would remember it!? that bad that our friendship just ended like that!!! zzz

i asked him whether he even cared how i feel.. coz he just suddenly stopped talking to me and whenever i try to ask him out to catch up and all its always a no..but he always seems to have so much time for the rest of the leeming girls.. i askd him why he treated me differntly to the rest and he said "its because they are my friends"... blehh! sigh. it really hurts i told him.. coz he just suddenly rejected me and i dont even know why..and in return he told me that he doesnt care how i feel and that i should not try so hard to be friends with him again.. and to let him come to me instead when hes not angry with me any more and forgives me!? what the hell does that mean! blehh!! @@@ sigh :(

sigh it seems that 2008 isnt looking as bright as i had hoped for :( sigh.

anyways next issue in my current life lol. *scrolls up*
OH! hahahah ok well this isnt really an issue..its more a complaint and a deprivation! lols =/ hahaha. sigh. i think its probably due to the roger problem too! haha sigh.. i feel lonley! i miss having someone as my own sigh but i know thaht i cant have the boy that i love and that i probably cant and wont be finding a boyfriend any time soon lol so that leads me to thinking about the boys iv met in beijing! haha! yes sad i know. but im sad coz i dont have a boyfriend or roger so give me a break! lol.

mmm yes deprivation.. of boys :S lol.. dodgy yes it may sound but.. like boys.. girls need their daily doses of guy! hahaha. sigh. i mean i got my guy friends.. so im not feeling as shit as when i was overseas hahah. if i blogged about it..i forget? lol. but yeah. this time its just.. having somoene and having someone kiss me and hold me :( zzz.

honestly, i dont think im really looking for a boyfriend or wanting one any time tooo soon!! of course i would lilke one. man once youve had a boy/girl u know that its so much nicer than being single. although singleness has its obvious advantages! lols ;) hahah but yeahh. sigh so anyways. since im not really looking. Oh which comes to something that iv planned to stick to this year! haha to not look and to wait! lol. although, after what happend last year, waiting didnt do me tooo good either. hmmm. lols. zz.

in kl i went out to lunch with my mom and her friends and i was lectured and told stories about their love life haha. no not in a ew way! but like. how they met their husbands and fell in love and knew that it was love. :) and how they are all still together right now hehhehe. its really sweet actually. sigh. i would love to get married :) and have a husband who really loves me and will be with me forever and ever and a day :) sigh. makes me miss roger lol coz i thought that me and him would be together forever and a day :( he used to promise me that and want to marry me and told me that he loved me every single morning and night :( sigh. gaaar.. the promises the guys make u! zzz. guys can be such asses sometimes lols hahaha. sigh but its not just the guys fault i tell u. its the girls faults also for being so stupid and beliving them and our need for wanting to be loved and cared for by a boy.

anyways back to the lunch. lol they were telling me about their husbands and how they met them etc etc. it was quiet sweet actually :) how they all first met and they knew it was meant to be etc haha. one of them was saying how she thought it was love at first sight. how he walked into her work and she was like wow hes the one :P ahahah but then later she thought that he was married! coz he had a ring on his wedding finger lol so she was crushed and backed off. lols but then sumhow found out that he wasnt and that ring was from his mom? or grandma? lol i cant rmber haha. but yeah in the end they got married :D and awww..lols. it was love at first sight! hahaha

another lady was telling us how she met him and he kept chasing after her. lol coz at that time she already had a boyfriend lol.and she wasnt looking. but this guy kept chasing after her and blah blah lol.. i couldnt really understand what she was sayin to tell u the truth lol. she had a very strong umm.. african/french accent! hahah. it was hard to understand lah lol. but i got bits of it and in the end they got married lah hahahaha.

moral of all their stories were: its FATE! zz hahah and that you cant force someone to love you. if its meant to be its meant to be! and if they love you they will come back running and chasing after you. thats when you know that they really do love you and will love you forever. :) sigh and yeah its all fate. just to enjoy life and then when the right one comes things will just naturally work out :) hehe to be patient :)

its quite sweet if you think about it. lols but like i dont know if i really believe in fate? lol hahah. i dunno, maybe just because my heart has been torn out by roger already lol and it hurted so much that i dont believe in happy endings too much anymore. sigh. but i stil believe that im a romantic :) hahaha. but i dunoo.. i guess the love isnt there anymore and the hope has kinda faded. sigh but im sure in time it will be restored. maybe when i find a boyfriend again hahaha. or find someone worth fighting for :)

haha well that was great! my rambling has done what it always finds itself doing! hahah rambled my way off topic :D hahah woot woot go me lol :P but it was a good topic wasnt it? lol about love and fate hahah =/ sigh
but after all that ive been through with boys i mean.. hmmm i find myself thinking that having expectations and planning too ahead into the future wont do you no good either. wishing in a fairytale or a prince...these things just kill you in the end coz theres no such thing as a perfect relationship or a happily ever after. i mean yes ok..happily ever after is finding the guy of your dreams and for him to love you forever and trully..and then marrying him and growing old with him :) but... love and life isnt perfect, people have their hiccups in between..its just normal! sigh and never to plan things too far ahead when ur with someone coz most of the time it just comes crushing down on you and you go your seperate ways. sigh. how depressing lols.

haha speaking about breakups. i think this year may be breakup year! LOls. alot of my friends seem to be calling it quits with their partners :S:( its not a good thing no lol. sigh but maybe...hopefully its just a temporary thing :) hehe. this year is meant to be lucky and to be good! its 2008! such an asian year hahah for good luck and such :D lets hope its true :)

anyways back to the topic we were on before i started rambling about fate and the lunch with the ladies hahaha. boys! hmmm, i miss jun! :S lol haha sigh i wish that i had met him earlier, like instead of tom :S sigh. coz tom in the end just turned out to be a slut. mmm probably the same with jun =/ zz hes such a bad boy lol but gosh sigh. i wish i met him earlier and saw him every one of them fridays :) sigh *dreams* hahaha..

yea this is my boy problem. im thinkn about the past too much. zz well this be partly due to..jun being extremely gorgeous and such a sweet talker and to have only had that one friday night with him *argh* sigh. hmm n yeah ahhaha there are no nice hot guys in perth! zz and perth is just so small that word gets around so fast! duude. man me typing my shit here.. is also probably a terrible idea because people read it and then it could get passed on and blahblah and then soon iwl find that half my friends know what happend or how i feel and blah.. lol. hm but i guess thats my fault that i type my shit out on a blog haha. woot go me. double wammmi zz. but if i dont i got nowun to share and spill my insides to hahaa. hmm thahts why my tactic is to ramble as much crap as possible so that nowun actually reads the whole blog hahaha. it gets them distracted lols and then they dont really read everything :D haha woot woot! sigh im soo lame! no i dont actually ramble on purpose.. its just me ok. zz.. my blogs must be so entertaining! hahaha. and soo full of crap :D woot ! :P

i love blogging hahahaha

anyways prison break! lol i finished season one finally lol and omg the ending is so arghh! and i forgot to bring back season two from beijing! so now ihave to wait! OMG zzz they really had to end it with them on the run and about to get caught! arghhh! lol.

why did i start prison break soo late? lol hahah. well i think back in the day when it started i was already hooked on other shows like house and the oc or sumtink lol i duno.. haha no not the oC i got over that after about season one and a bit of two. lols :) man the OC was pretty cool at the start ok. hahaha but then it went lame lols. and it was just soo dodgy haah. zz

hmm i watched like parts of season one and two of prison break throughout the years but i never properly followed it! ...hmm yes i think i know why.. because it was showing on the same time as house or ncis. i forget lol but channel seven couldnt beat channel ten lols.. they should have aired it at a differnt time or day! raar! gawd they should replace home and away and neighbours with proper shows zz.

oh gosh which brings me to another problem that i have.. hahaha. *the list just keeps going and going huh hahaha* TV is a problem in my household now. WHY? because, before i left to beijing my vcr which is hooked onto to my tv because our remote control for the tv died a long time ago so we connected the vcr to the tv to control it.lol. well the vcr died and there is a tape stuck in it which wont come out. and coz it wont come out the player keeps screwing up and turning off. meaning, we cant control the tv.. meaning NO TV! zzz

no im not that stupid, i did try to just connect the antenna to the tv but we couldnt find any reception and so no channels..thus again no TV sigh. cries.
i dont use the tv that often but i cant live without a tv! gosh i get so bored sometimes i need to watch the tv! argh sigh and there are so many good shows out now adays. sigh. cries. i need my tv back :(

bleh anyways iv been blogging away for 37 mins exactly now. i shall go to sleep lol. i got uni tmro haha. but i think iwl go to the 3pm class instead of 9am hahaha :P hmm sweet dreams all and hope you enjoyed my rambling :P:P

- dreamer (goodnights)

serenery

i believe that the simple things in life are always the most important
that we should never take the people around us for-granted.
life is never long enough, and is an unexpected journey.
and every obstacle are just life's tests to shape who we are,
that mistakes aren't "mistakes" but learning blocks to better ourselves.
i believe you have to take risks - to live life to the fullest and make the most of what we have.
because we only live once.

~ my goal of book reading still stands this year haha and so now i have decided to just list all the books iv been reading and read
> The Five People You Meet in Heaven - Mitch Albom
> Tuesdays with Morrie - Mitch Albom
> My Sister's Keeper - Jodi Picoult
> Vanishing Acts - Jodi Picoult
> The Da Vinci Code - Dan Brown
> Deception Point - Dan Brown
> Highway Guitar Rose - Bridget Lowry
> The Pelican Brief - John Grisham
> Adrian Mole: The Wilderness Years - Sue Townsend
> For One Last Day - Mitch Albom
> Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix - JK Rowlings
> Bridget Jone's Diary [the first one]
- Harry Potter and the Half Blooded Prince - JK Rowlings
- Singletini - Amanda Trimble
- Falling Blossom - Peter Pagnamenta and Momoko Williams
- The Deep End of the Ocean - i shall getbak to u lol
- Ugly - Constance Briscoe
- Simply Irresistible - Rachel Gibson

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